If you’re not ready to be a mom just yet, you don’t have to be.
Choosing to let someone else adopt your baby is often a difficult decision, but it’s also selfless and responsible if you’re not in the right situation to look after a child. You’re putting your baby before yourself, which is an incredible thing to do.
But, just because you’re okay with adoption doesn’t mean you’re up for giving up any say over your baby’s life, which is where an adoption plan. With a good plan, you can have a say over the future of your child and layout your terms for the adoptive parents. If you’re struggling with your plan, it’s a good idea to do some research and use expert resources; this is going to affect your child’s future, after all!
For great resources, check out these birthmother books that we love.
The Open Adoption Experience
The fact that this book was published in the 90s (1993 to be exact) puts a lot of birthmothers off. But, it shouldn’t! Though quite old now, it’s still full of useful, timeless information about adoption for everyone involved in the adoption of a child and is a wonderfully positive resource. It speaks of the benefits of adoption, the different processes that you have to go through, and how to deal with the whole thing.
If you’d like to look into having an open adoption and staying in touch with your child, this a great aid. It talks a lot about how to keep this connection open and how to create a great setup for you, your child, and the adoptive parents for many years to come. In our opinion, every birth mother in the adoption world should read it!
Lifegivers: Framing the Birthparent Experience in Open Adoption
If you’re looking for a compassionate book from an author that truly empathizes with the journey birthmothers have to go on, this is the resource for you! Although the author, James L. Gritter, isn’t the father of a child who’s been adopted, he really understands the process and the emotions that run through it. Heartfelt, informative, and truly sympathetic with birth mothers, it’s a wonderful book that’s incredibly useful.
If you’re finding your emotions are a bit all over the place during the process, this book will help you to see that that’s normal. If you’re feeling misunderstood, this book will provide a welcome relief in the form of someone who understands.
It’s another great resource for open adoptions, too. Not only will this help you form your adoption plan, but it’ll help you understand more about the options you chose. Even if you’re not interested in an open adoption, it’s a good idea to read this book so you understand more about the adoption options you might be missing out on.
Pregnant? Adoption is an Option
This book is geared towards young women with an unplanned pregnancy who might not have access to hundreds of resources or a lot of support. This doesn’t just focus on choosing adoption, but actually looks at a wider range of options for women, helping you make sure you’re making the right decision. It’s super insightful into the effects of different choices on you, the father, and the child, really helping you weigh up your choices.
While being incredibly honest, the book is still positive about adoption. They don’t sugarcoat the experience, but that’s very useful and will help you prepare properly! The information you find will also help you create an adoption plan that considers everyone and you should feel much more capable of making tough decisions after reading this.
Dear Birthmother: Thank You For Our Baby
When it comes to adoption books for birthmothers, this one is a little different. Rather than being full of facts and information, it’s instead made up of the correspondence between birthmothers and adoptive parents – and, yes, it’s 100% real! By giving you a sneak peek into the worlds of other birthmothers and adoption plans, you should get a much better idea of how to navigate your own, including what you want and what you definitely don’t.
Learn from mistakes and triumphs, understand both sides of adoption, and become more knowledgable about the process. This is another book we’d recommend for everyone involved in adoption because it’s so insightful and understanding. Even adopted children can learn more about their situation from this book, along with many others.
Given in Love: For Mothers Who Are Choosing an Adoption Plan
When you’re creating an adoption plan, chances are that there are going to be a lot of emotions you’re going to have to deal with. Or, perhaps you won’t feel much at all, which in itself can be very emotional and hard to process. From grief and loss to ambivalence or even anger, birthmothers experience a whole spectrum of feelings as they create adoption plans.
This book takes a look into these emotions and helps to prepare you for what may lie ahead on your own journey. It also offers advice on hard topics, like naming the baby and writing letters to your child, which will be incredibly useful when these things come up for you. The author has created a shoulder to cry on and someone to lean on in the form of a book, which is pretty incredible!
Birthmother Books, Blogs, and Plenty of Advice
Birthmother books aren’t the only resource you’re going to need as you navigate the world of adoption as a birth mother, but they’re a great start! While you wait for these books to arrive on your doorstep, be sure to take a look at our help for birthmothers at Florida Adoptions. We’re experienced in the world of adopting and can sympathize with what you’re going through while offering practical advice to help you create your plan.